I've seen countless players driven to despair after all the losses they've been through. And despair leads to rushed decisions that don't change anything.
In their anger, wanting to let it all out, players say things and do things they don't really mean deep down: “That's it, I'm not playing again.” “I'm not coming back.” “That was the last time.” (I wrote about those words in “Never again”, and back the next day.)
From words to a ban
Some don't stop at words. They go as far as self-exclusion: they ask to be banned, from a venue, a casino or a betting site. And here's the detail that matters: almost always, they choose a time limit. Three months. Six months. Very rarely, a lifetime ban.
The crack left open
This is where I want to stop, because this is where the heart of it is. Because of the despair he's fallen into, the player says and does things he doesn't really mean. Deep down, he doesn't want to stop playing at all. That's why he doesn't take the step of a lifetime ban.
The player hides from himself. He says “exclusion”, but he leaves a crack open. When I write this, I see myself, as if it were yesterday. A gambler believes he can stop completely for a while. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way.
And the industry knows it. From behind the counter, I saw venues gently steer people who wanted to stop towards a time-limited ban, usually six months, rather than a lifetime one. Why? Because a customer with a six-month ban is a customer who may come back in six months. And very often, they did.
When the door opens again
The players who stop at words usually play again the next day. And if not the next day, then certainly within the week. I saw it happen over and over at work.
The players who put a time limit on their ban break that decision very easily, too. Not only when the time runs out, but often long before, through illegal gambling, online or in back-room venues. Illegal gambling has no exclusions. It doesn't even have rules. For the player, it's a wide-open door that leads him back, again and again, into gambling's arms.
That's why where you play matters so much. A licensed venue or site can exclude you. An unlicensed one can't, and won't. And a player who knows there's still somewhere he can go is, in a strange way, at peace with his “ban”: he knows it doesn't really close anything.
So is self-exclusion worth it?
Yes. I don't want anyone to read this article and think the opposite. Self-exclusion is a real wall, and the longer it is, the stronger it holds. Where a lifetime option exists, it's the one that doesn't leave a crack. You'll find the official schemes for each country on Where to find help.
But it's one wall, not all of them. It closes the doors it can see: the licensed ones. The doors it can't see, the illegal sites, the back rooms, the friend's account, need walls of their own. In my book I go through all the steps, so that the player can get out of the trap once and for all. It takes will and determination from the player, and the right guidance.
